Wellcultured - Well Cultured is a men’s online magazine with advice and reviews on fashion, dating, finances, health, music, movies and many other topics, as well as a robust message board and the Well Cultured Guide, a freely editable community wiki.

Most guys tell me that the absolute best girlfriend they can imagine is one that shares their interests- and around here on WellCultured, that kind of girl is the gamer girl. Unfortunately, few girls of this rare breed exist, but for the ones that do, many of us are a bit confused- after all, what do you do with a girl who can tear you apart in Street Fighter? Here are some pointers.

1. She is a girl, treat her as such.

One of the biggest irritations gamer girls have is that they are either considered the “token girl” or are lumped in the group as a guy- a dichotomy they end up hating. Girls are girls- there are about 50% of them in the world. Don’t treat her like a good guy friend- trust me, lots of beer and midnight games of Dead or Alive Xtreme Beach Volleyball will not go well with her (for the most part). She doesn’t want to be “another guy” to you- remember, there are plenty of guys you can enjoy that sort of stuff with- she’s the only one you can have sex with (in the strictest sense). Even worse, avoid treating her as some sort of token girl, revering her and acting as if she is some sort of enemy from the “normal” world. Too many girls get this treatment (Remember the term “Shotgun/Rocket Bitch” from the Quake/UT matches of yesteryear?)- and they detest it. Treat her like a girl- don’t leave her out of your gaming, but certainly don’t expect her to be a carbon clone of your gaming buddies.

2. Don’t White Knight her, unless you must.

During gaming, avoid being the “White Knight” by protecting her all the time in the game. In multiplayer shooting games, this gets old quickly- and trust me, she figures it out pretty fast. If you play games with her, make sure to teach her the controls and mechanics properly, but don’t feel like you have to babysit her in games- if she’s a gamer girl, she’ll figure out pretty quickly. It’s insulting for most girls to feel “protected” in games like that- especially if she’s leagues better than you at it.

There is one important exception to this- don’t gang up on her or let people berate her. Be relaxed if people begin to hit on her or flame her (trust me, it happens to every girl), but make sure to make a stand if some neckbeard begins getting creepy in private chat. Similarly, if you can, avoid playing AGAINST her (as in, if you can, play on her team or be cooperative)- she’ll feel challenged/threatened if you try to bring the smackdown every time you play.

3. Don’t obsess over gaming.

You may want to talk about it all the time, but like every other hobby, there is a limit. The biggest complaint I hear from “gamer girls” of any type is, simply enough, they get the overly obsessed guys who don’t know much else. There is a life other than gaming- and even if you have a ton of consoles at home and sat in line for the latest release of your favorite game, there are plenty of other things to talk about. As a rule of thumb, if you are on a date and can only talk about “geeky” things intelligently (and she’s not the one bringing them up), you have a problem.

4. Include her in your habits, create a healthy balance.

Don’t get terretorial about your gaming habits- while you may be used to playing alone, expect that she will want to be involved, so be open to the idea. Sure, you may want to play your new single player game alone, but expect she’ll want to play/watch- there’s nothing wrong with that. Newer games are more cinematic than ever, so even watching can be entertaining.

Still, don’t hog your gaming consoles. Sure, you may want to remove the hand that dares touch your PS3 the day you buy MGS4, but be willing to be flexible. She will want to play games just as much as you do- so be willing to hand over the controller/computer. Or make her sit on your lap naked, that works too.

5. Don’t bash Cosplay, Fandoms or cutesy games; they work to your favor.

Let me say this straight out. This is one of the biggest secrets of gaming:

Most of that fanart, including the nudes of game characters? All those pervy little fanfics?

A lot of those are written by WOMEN. Yes. Lots of girls like to cosplay, play cute games, and draw characters from video games. This is awesome. For one, encouraging more girls to dress up like Eva from MGS3 may be my life’s purpose (see my picture as to why). Even cutesy games can be beneficial to you- and hey, let’s face it, some of the most enjoyable games (Katamari Damacy, for one) are like that.

I normally refrain from being so blunt, but let me put it to you this way: Cosplay can be pretty damn hot. Making her cosplay semi-nude characters is even more so. Just saying, I’ll suck up my hate for the histrionic bitch cosplayers of the world if I get the “good” side of it.

6. Avoid making her a trophy.

This goes with #1, but it needs to be said again: she is not a trophy. Do not drag her to LAN parties and make her sit in the corner. Do not make her follow you around as you browse Gamestop. DO NOT BRING HER TO A LAUNCH OF A GAME AT MIDNIGHT AND MAKE HER SIT IN LINE FOR YOU FOR EVERYONE TO SEE (I’m looking at you, anonymous Metal Gear Solid 4 launch guy, she didn’t even know what the game was). Trust me, we are not impressed, we’re just feeling awkward from her “get me out of here” expression.

7. Overall, treat her like a normal girlfriend.

This applies to every single girl you will ever date, but I’ll say it in closing: treat her normally. She wants to go on dates, she’ll want thoughtful gifts on occasion, she wants to be treated like a girl, and she wants you to be her true love. She enjoys video games. That’s nice. Focus on things OTHER than her gaming habits- make her a girlfriend, not a buddy-that-happens-to-have-breasts, and you’ll do just fine.

Also, if any of you ever con her into playing Rez with the “Trance Vibrator”, I want to know. I will give you a manly high five.

Tags: Dating, gaming, girls

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