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“The Frisky”, a Turner-run equivalent to this site for women, has recently posted an article simply entitled “10 Things Women Don’t Understand About Men“, in which they ask some really ridiculous questions about men’s behavior. That being said, obviously, such an opportunity will not go ignored here- so here are the answers for The Frisky’s “10 Things Women Don’t Understand About Men“.

1. What is so hard about asking for directions?

It’s all ego and a little bit of wanderlust. The predominant theme, of course, is the ego- and in a general sense, the desire to fix something for oneself. Men typically are acculturated (at least in the west) to be as little interdependent as possible, which is precisely why the problem of “we’re lost” is generally fixed by the thought of “I’ll find a way out by myself”. As well, most guys have a kind of passive desire to discover things for themselves, as opposed to following directions- meaning, in essence, that it’s more “fun” to see the inner mechanisms yourself than to have someone explain it to you in detail.

2. Why do you need a gadget to unlock your car door?

I’m not sure why (stereotypical) women pretend like they don’t have their own gadgetry to fool around with- like vibrating mascara brushes (yes, that does sound dirty) and the like. In general, men like gadgets because they represent the new and the strange- and a lot of guys like the status bonus of having the latest and greatest stuff. As ironic as it may be, this is the exact reason why many self-important “businessmen” once ran around with pagers strapped to their belts- it had nothing to do with convenience as much as it had to do with the ambiance it perceptibly gave them.

3. What is it about “Star Wars”?

“Star Wars” is famous because it is generally accepted to be a really good genre-defining movie. “Star Wars” isn’t what we would consider some sort of tear-jerking masterpiece of writing, but what it does is evokes a sense of fun that only the Sci-Fi genre can. Similarly, movie series like the “Indiana Jones” series do this well not because of the complexity of the story, but because, in a kind of “Flash Gordon” sort of way, we get a kick out of the simplicity and action. Many guys will argue there’s a lot of depth to “Star Wars”- that may or may not be true, but it seems to mainly boil back down to the idea of the genre being fun for the sake of fun.

4. And the “bro hug”? Hug it out or don’t hug it out, you know?

As I’ll also note below, men do not like to touch each other, mainly because inter-male affection is frowned upon in most Western societies. In India and many other countries, this is very different- but you get what your culture has borne, and in this case, it’s a strong sense of personal space between members of the male sex. Would you much rather have us holding hands and hugging affectionately (as happens in the streets of India much more than it does between members of the opposite sex)? I think not.

5. When you keep one seat between you and your buddy at the movies, are you saving room for the holy spirit or what?

See the above. It also happens to give us more leg room and more arm room, which is ultimately more comfortable. If you ever take the time to look, most men sit fairly spread out, which is often cited as an attempt to be dominant and mark space. Females, trained to be relatively compact (both possibly as a sign of submission and also as a way to prevent showing panties in a skirt), do not do this.

6. Why are you so hung up on the bitchy girls?

Why are you so hung up on bitchy guys? The answer is simple: no-one likes problematic people, regardless of gender.

7. If you want to break up with us, why don’t you say so?

I’m not entirely sure where this question comes from (smacks of some angry female author making an article about an ex-boyfriend or something), but the general answer to this is just as complex as with girls: a lot of reasons. Some guys like the sex. Some don’t know how to safely break it off. Some don’t know if they want to break it off themselves. It’s always different and very hard to describe, and very dependent on the situation at hand.

8. Forget about putting the seat down, why don’t you ever change the toilet paper roll?

What kind of silly question is this? Guys are different. I have a good few male friends who actually get so semantic that they debate which way the toilet paper should be hung. If we’re making grandiose stereotypes, allow me to continue with them: we do it because the ever-present debate of toilet paper hanging has yet to be remedied.

9. Why do you ask for our number if you have no intention of calling?

There’s an insane amount of stigma attached to calling a girl, which some guys balk at. Additionally, some guys (myself included, at times) do not understand the proper protocol for certain number-givings. Merely deciding to call is hard enough- if you were vague in any way (or made appearances of being reluctant to give the number), often a guy will read that as a subtle sign and merely not call. In other cases, if you gave the number in a casual situation (i.e. in the sense of a club or meeting or business sort of thing), many guys will not call because they think it falls into the “box” of the aforementioned group, and that it would be rude to call. Even if they do decide to call and want to call, there is something rather intimidating about calling out of the blue for a date- try cold calling a male friend sometime.

10. Seriously, do you not smell that?

There’s actually some validity to the idea that men smell differently than women- but hey, let’s presume that we both do in a similar way. Pending that everything else is equal, everyone (regardless of gender, age, etc) has a very hard time smelling their own body odors after a while, mainly because they acclimate to the smell. Because of that, you too probably smell in some respects, no matter how much cleanser and perfume you may be wearing.

I really enjoy having lots of video games, posters, and all sorts of other stuff available to me. But sometimes, it’s a bit too much. At this point, virtually every average joe has a DVD collection of some kind, a game console or two, and some general crap that just needs to be organized. Here is 8 ways to do that.

8. Let everything have a “place”‘

nuff said- your gaming stuff belongs in a specific location, your books in another, etc. One of the biggest flaws of most pads is that they tend to mix up in one jumble- avoid it. If you have work or schoolwork in your place, make sure it is in a special location where you know where to find it.

This makes sense both from a physical and mental perspective. If you know where things are, you will naturally not only be able to find them better, but it will begin to make sense- and you will feel less overwhelmed when it comes to general clutter. It’s always much easier to mentally “know” when it’s time to work when you go to your desk with your paperwork on it- or when it’s time to screw off when you go to your couch to play a video game.

7. Open up floorspace

This is simple- get rid of tables and things that obstruct your ability to walk around freely in your place. Never stick chairs and other objects in your way- not only is it a safety hazard, but it’s just stupid. If you can’t walk from one end of a room to another with some path without tripping over something (or having to step over it), then you have a problem. All this requires is a bit of reorganization.

6. Make those decorations classy, not crappy

Repeat after me: Posters should never be taped to the wall, nailed to the wall, stapled to the wall, or otherwise stuck on a bare wall.

Okay.

Poster frames are cheap and easy to acquire- use them. If you like having movie posters around, get the ones you like and get decent quality frames- it will look leagues better and less college student-esque. More so, avoid going overboard on other forms of wall decorations- the general rule of thumb is, nothing out of a magazine you tear out, and think stylistically before fanatically. As spartan as that sounds, it will help.

5. Get better, more suited furniture

Ditch the childish “gaming chairs” and related junk. You do not need a special “gamer edition” desk to properly enjoy video games- you just look like an idiot. If you are over 15 years old, inflatable chairs are childish. Similarly, never use multipurpose furniture (see: folding tables) for furniture- it looks bad and unprepared.

I do know furniture is expensive, but trust me, it’s worth it. There’s nothing stupider than seeing a 20-something with a living room comprised of bean bag chairs.

4. Pack and store away (or throw away) stuff you don’t need

Box it and toss it, give it away, or put it away. Some things (winter clothes during summer, various photo albums or the like) don’t need to be out all of the time- so put it away, label it, and don’t worry about it. If you don’t intend to wear an article of clothing again, donate it to charity. Shit, if you have furniture you don’t like, donate THAT to charity.

3. Toss old game consoles, emulate

We all love old games- however, it’s come to the point when none of us can really fit a NES, SNES, Genesis, N64, PS1/2, Dreamcast, and XBOX into our everyday lives. The nice thing? All of what I listed (and more) can now be emulated with a decent computer with some good tinkering, and you can enjoy your games on one system.

This takes a bit of work, but pays off for it in the long run. While it may limit your ability to play multiplayer, the ease of getting many good multiplayer games via new consoles makes it ridiculously simple to enjoy old games with friends. You can easily set up an emulator on your existing PC, or even go so far as to make a cheap Linux box for your media center that plays all your favorite games- it all works. And it’s all sweet, and a lot easier than having a ton of stuff crammed into your cabinets.

2. Get organizing solutions

Stop jamming clothing into boxes, DVDs into random bags, and books into drawers. If you enjoy making a collection, it should be no surprise that you need to invest in good ways to organize your collection- ways that don’t risk you losing your stuff, or even worse, harming it due to improper storage.

There are plenty of storage solutions for anything you might have- from CDs to DVDs to anything in between. For DVDs, invest in shelving that specifically fits DVDs as closely as possible. For books, invest in typical shelving, but make sure it can hold the weight of the collective books. For clothing, get a nice dresser or shelving solution, and never neglect your closet- get uniform, nice-quality wooden hangers.

Let’s put it this way- if you don’t keep it organized, you might lose it. And that would suck.

1. Sell old technology for better stuff

One of the silliest things I’ve seen in recent days is someone who had a fairly powerful PC (8000 series nVidia, etc) using a huge rear-projection television at 1024×768 for “hardcore gaming”.

No.

Old technology is big, bulky, and most important of all, useless. Unless you are a collector, there is no reason why you should have hundred pound CRT monitors or large bulky PC cases. Sell what you have and spend the cash getting something nice and worthwhile. For example, large rear-projection TV sets can sell for $400 or more- the same amount of cash you could use on a sweet 1080p flatscreen. Similarly, huge off-white PC cases can easily be replaced by a tech for smaller, sleeker cases that don’t take up a desk of their own- it isn’t expensive or hard.

Yes, this does require a bit of cash, but it’s worth it.